


The Could-Have-Been Collection

by Fox_the_Hermit



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor, Idea Collection, One Shot, One Shot Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-05-10 23:14:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5604592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fox_the_Hermit/pseuds/Fox_the_Hermit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a collection of random AU short stories for Harry Potter, and various plot bunnies for stories about Harry Potter that I will never write.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Could-Have-Been Collection

**The Power He Knew Not**

“Well, it explains a lot.” sighed Harry, having finished reading his mother’s last journal entry aloud.

“That’s an under exaggeration, Harry.” snorted Hermione.

“Alright, it explains everything, Hermione.”

“But who’d have known? You get all the luck Harry.” groaned Ron.

“No one _could_ know Ron. Except for Harry’s parents. And even they didn’t guess what could happen later… They thought he was just lucky to have survived.”

“My mum must have been _bonkers._ The chance of that turning out fine had been one in a million.”

“Your original luck must have been off the record already, Harry.”

“I wonder if I now buy a lottery ticket, I’ll win all the prizes?” he mused.

“Harry!”

“What, Hermione? Harry is entitled to try.”

“It’s cheating, Ron!”

“And I am already going to be denied the pleasure of ever playing any professional sport. Mind you, I really want to go to Las Vegas. I ought to win everything.”

There was a moment of silence as the friends considered the benefits.

“In retrospect, it’s strange no one ever figured it out. The super easy challenges in first year? Killing a basilisk by stabbing it with as sword and not dying? Functional time paradox in third year? Winning the TriWizard?” Hermione wondered.

“You could say it was _luck_ , Hermione. Mind you, having Voldemort fall through the veil by tripping on a banana peel? That was the greatest stroke of luck I could have hoped for. Maybe I am invincible, too.”

“Don’t let that Felix Felicis go to your head, Harry.”

“I think it already had, when I almost drowned in my Mum’s cauldron. Seriously, though, Luck? That was the _power he knew not_?”

 

 

**Dragon Slayers**

“Tell me again, how important is it, that we slay this dragon?” asked Hermione, wiping sweat off her forehead.

“Very.” groaned Harry, vanishing ash from his glasses.

Suddenly, unholy screaming erupted from somewhere left of the rock they were hiding behind.

“Ron doesn’t seem to be having much luck, is he?” 

“No Harry, he isn’t.”

Suddenly, with a pop, Ron appeared, covered in soot. “You know guys, soon enough I’ll hate the dragon enough to kill it with the Avada. We’ve had… what? Eight tries each already?”

“It’s worse than a cockroach. At least those are small, don’t breathe fire and don’t fly. Anyway, your turn, Harry.”

Harry steeled himself, drew his wand, and apparated to the highest ledge in the cave.

The dragon was beneath him, curiously looking around, trying to find its prey. Harry thought it was rather magnificent, gold and black. Unfortunately, he needed to kill it to get to the chamber it was guarding.

As he tried to think of another way to kill the beast, he wondered why anyone ever thought the Hufflepuff House was weak, when it’s founder decided to guard her Secret Chamber with a dragon.

 

**Food Pranks**

“Harry? Why are you hiding behind me? What did you do?”

“Hang on, let me put the cloak on first!”

No sooner than Harry had disappeared, Hermione marched into the Gryffindor Common Room. She was furious, hair crackling with electricity and wand on the ready.

“Tell. Me. Where. Harry. Is.” She ground out through clenched teeth.

Everyone went silent. Ron gulped, and Hermione zeroed in on his nervousness like a hawk.

“Tell me.” 

“He’s… He’s under his cloak, probably no longer behind me. Ummm… Why are you looking for him?” He quailed under her furious gaze.

“You’ll see. You’ll all see. And taste, too. For the whole next week.”

Harry chose this moment to try to sneak past her, through the portrait hole, and she grabbed him, the cloak falling off. He gulped.

“Fix it.”

“I can’t.”

“Oh yes you can. You did it, didn’t you?”

“Hermione, what did Harry do?”

“He managed to make it so that the only food that will be served in the Great Hall for the next week will be pizza. Only pizza, and nothing but pizza. Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner.”

 


End file.
